Fricasseed Sucking Puppies



By Atom Bergstrom

Atom’s Blog


Human beings are omnivores.

We can survive on just about anything.

We can even thrive on just about anything.

But can we survive and thrive for an extended period of time on just about anything?

Can we die young at a very old age on any kind of food?

John Bell (“On Regimen and Longevity: Comprising Materia Alimentaria, National Dietetic Usages, and the Influence of Civilization on Health and the Duration of Life,” The Medico-Chirurgical Review, No. 41, 1844) wrote …

“The ancient Greeks subsisted mainly on vegetable food, though animal food was undoubtedly used by them at least occasionally, as Homer so often specifies the kinds of meat served up at the repasts of his heroes, as when Agamemnon, at an entertainment which he gave to Ajax, presented this latter with the chine of an ox, as a reward for his valour: and Alcinous in a banquet fed his guest upon beef. But the very emphatic mention of these things is considered a mark of their rarity, and to show that they were only served up to those in high rank and power. It has been observed, as illustrative of the dairy fare of those whom the heads of the house were not particularly desirous of pleasing, — that the suitors of Penelope, though given to all sorts of pleasure, are never entertained with either fish or fowl, or any delicacies.

“The diet of the Romans in the early ages of the republic was extremely simple, consisting mainly of vegetable aliment of the commonest kind, such as pulse [edible seeds of various crops of the legume family] or barley. Afterwards, however, the latter was replaced by wheat, and barley was only used in cases of necessity, from the failure of the wheat crops, or as a punishment to the soldiers who had misbehaved. Thus, we learn, that in the second Punic war [218 to 201 BC], the cohorts which lost their standards had an allowance of barley assigned to them by Marcellus. Augustus Caesar commonly punished the cohorts which gave ground to the enemy, by a decimation [killing every tenth man], and allowing them no provision but barley.

“As Rome increased in wealth and power, however, the diet of the citizens underwent a great change; not only was animal food freely taken, but the Romans indulged in a much greater variety than is acceptable to our modern notions. Fricasseed sucking puppies were in great request, and water-rats, snails, and maggots fattened on old timber, were among their greatest dainties. But most of our readers are without doubt too well acquainted with the description of the supper in the style of the ancients, in Peregrine Pickle, to render any further account necessary.

“In the East, the food is generally vegetable; rice, perhaps, being the article in greatest use.

“In Upper Egypt, where they cannot procure rice, they make a hasty meal on boiled horse-beans [Vicia faba], or of lentils steeped in oil. Onions are used to an incredible extent. Dates supply them with sustenance part of the year; and in Summer, the vast quantities of gourds and melons which are then produced, place within easy reach an agreeable variety. Their drink is the water of the Nile, more or less purified, with an occasional addition or alternation of buffalo milk.

“In Abyssinia [the Ethiopian Empire], however, the people evince a marked penchant, not only for flesh meat, but for raw flesh cut out of an animal alive, and while the fibres are yet quivering.

“‘The favorite portion is called the shulada, and is cut out, on each side, from the buttocks, near the tail. As soon as these are taken away, the wounds are sewed up by these surgical butchers, and plastered over with cow-dung. The animal, which had been thrown down before, and during the operation, is now allowed to rise, and is driven forward on its journey, The fashionable parties at Gundar, the capital of Abyssinia, are served with brinde, or raw meat, with the same hospitable feeling as, in our part of the world, they would be with venison chops, done to the turn. The animal, a cow or a bullock, is brought to the door, and the dainty pieces cut off in the manner above described. But, on this occasion, the animal is killed, before doing which, all the flesh is cut off in solid square pieces, without bones or much effusion of blood. Two or three servants are then employed, who, as fast as they can procure the brinde, lay it upon cakes of teff placed like dishes down on the table, without cloth or anything else beneath them.'”

I’ve heard of a piece of you-know-what, but the above practice takes the (teff) cake!

'Fricasseed Sucking Puppies' have 2 comments

  1. November 4, 2016 @ 3:12 pm Atom

    A woman with cystitis was “cured” after I convinced her that it wasn’t a good idea for her to have dinner with her ex-boyfriend.

    She was “pissed off” at him.

    She realized I was right en route to the hospital — and her pain instantly disappeared.

    She turned her car around and drove home instead.–illustrated.php


  2. November 4, 2016 @ 10:51 pm john oneill

    ya gunna need some serios mental power on a mc donlads and coke diet to stop rotting to death


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